Category: English

WRA Groups: Meet Los Castaños from El Salvador

Posted on by Monica Oliveros

WRA Groups: Meet Los Castaños from El Salvador

Posted on November 29, 2023

We’d like to introduce you to one of our 102 groups world-wide in West River Academy. Los Castaños is a group in El Salvador that is committed to educating their students in an expansive way.  This year celebrates seven years of educating students and teaching the community about alternative education.

The phenomenon of unschooling can be found in various ways: families who travel and their education is based on the cultures they discover on their journeys; some families do unschooling because their children are high performers in sports; others because they disagree with traditional education and many other reasons.

Ronda

Los Castaños

If we delve even further into how to carry out unschooling, we have families that do it individually and others in a community manner. Today, we want to show you this latest modality of unschooling, which is in a group-organized way, similar to a school structure outside of the traditional system.

Los Castaños was founded by Claudia Turcios, a Salvadorian who has embraced Natural Learning and is committed to providing practical knowledge for the next generation. Her vision was put into action on November 26, 2016, when she organized a small group of families to learn topics such as agriculture, cooking, managing finances, and the list goes on. Seven years later, her dream has expanded and now provides a solution to hundreds of families. This current year, she has more than 80 students and 20 teachers who share the same vision.

los castanos 3

What is the experience in Los Castaños like?

This alternative and bilingual school consists of children ages 3-18. Claudia and her team are with them on their educational process each step of the way. This is the second year that 12th graders will be graduating and certified by West River Academy.

Their methodology is a mix of Montessori, supported by emotional intelligence with a firm foundation of ethics. This is not a school where you leave your children at the school door mindlessly. The participation of families is essential for the healthy functioning of this institution.

Among their students, they have the competence and training to receive neuro-divergent students with autism, giftedness, and Down syndrome, which makes educational life inclusive and without distinctions in terms of opportunities and activities. Everyone is equally invited to participate in the different educational events offered by the school.

In addition to life in the classrooms, Los Castaños offers field activities that are previously planned and can be seen in their annual calendars—visits to museums and local or national parks. Even everyday places such as grocery shopping for their meals provide a guided experience to cultivate practical life skills.

los castanos 4

“At Los Castaños, we educate for peace.”

Claudia shared with us what a typical day looks like for them. The idea is that the day is flexible and offers an array of subject areas they can learn at their fingertips.

Of its 20 teachers and facilitators, some are permanent for each grade and others rotate to provide different natural learning activities weekly: music, cooking, arts, Kenpo/Karate, studio arts and design, and entrepreneurship. They actively participate in the Recicla 503 program as ambassadors of environmental care. They offer swimming, coding, yoga, mindfulness, and other practical and optional activities.

One of the main priorities to them is to have a comprehensive emotional education program, which promotes “self-knowledge, management of emotions and feelings, management of tension and stress, assertive communication, empathy, interpersonal relationships, conflict management, decision making, critical thinking, and creativity.”

Graduandos Los Castaños West River Academy

Graduation 2023

As we had mentioned, 5 of their students are graduating this year. One of the fundamental requirements at West River Academy is to complete an Educational Biography, a written essay about their educational journey from as far back as they can remember until now.

Claudia tells us that this activity was therapeutic for these young adults since they were able to internalize and reflect on everything they had learned. She said that this will have a positive impact on their future as adults, in more ways than we can know.

We are very excited to celebrate all of our high school graduates on December 15, 2023!

los castanos 6

Inspiration for everyone

Now that you know these spaces exist and are a reality, we hope to inspire other families to join, organize, and form a community. Likewise, search within your local area because without knowing it, there may be a school very similar to Los Castaños near you, where your children can obtain alternative, emotional, and ethical education in their community.

All the images in this article are actual photos of Los Castaños. Here are some pictures of its facilities:

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Thank you for daring to make a difference and supporting educational freedom!

Happy 7th Anniversary to Los Castaños!

Point of View on Curriculum at West River Academy

Posted on by Monica Oliveros

Point of View on Curriculum at West River Academy

Posted on October 9, 2023

  Undoubtedly, a curriculum organizes and greatly simplifies the student’s life. Having a guide of what to study according to age sounds logical since humans usually evolve similarly; we do so at different rates and depths. Find out how we view the curriculum at West River Academy.

The school, as we know it, came to solve a global problem: the massification of education. Only a few had access to theoretical knowledge just over a century ago. Time and time again, entire communities came to the same conclusion in different eras, which was inefficient in an increasingly connected and globalized world.

Humanity has continued to evolve, and this problem is in the past. More and more families know that they can ask themselves the individual question: “How do I study?” At first, it is just a concern, and sometimes just an unfulfilled desire: to be able to personalize your children’s education according to their interests and time. And this is where our point of view comes from.

Pila de libros coloridos

Curriculum

In an adult-centric world, it is expected to believe that the adult should guide their children’s education. At West River Academy, we believe that adults should only act as a companion, mere observers at the service of their children. Why? Because it is the individual who knows his vocation, his talents, and his purpose. No matter how old he is.

Routines tend to develop naturally when our toddlers are not in school without an external entity dictating 100% of it. These routines are structured by the parents’ available time, the needs that arise within the family, and even shaped by the culture of the geographical location of each family.

Without realizing it, these routines are study plans. Observing that our children love art and buying materials so they can doodle everywhere or a plastic musical instrument to emulate what they play is a study plan since it is taught to them. It gives our children the opportunity to explore their abilities through play.

niños estudiando en su cocina con mantas

How does a child who doesn’t go to school study?

Then school age arrives, and we wait patiently for the institution to give us a list of materials and books, and we trust that the study plan or curriculum is appropriate for our children. It’s the way that worked for our parents and that worked for us.

As this process is foreign to our planning, we feel the impulse to create a curriculum outside of our children’s planning, acting as the institution that offers knowledge, which entails a period of uncertainty if what they are learning is sufficient. And then bombard our children with information. It’s much simpler than this.

The first year can be the most overwhelming, and doing so alone usually takes longer to unschool. When you sign up with us, you have one-hour personalized consultations. Also, we have monthly meetings with other families and monthly zooms with the WRA director, answering common questions, which makes the process much more bearable and faster.

In our article “Students who do not fit into the traditional education system,” we share several links to websites with study plans as support. At the same time, you can unschool your adult brain and create a study plan with the flexibility your children need to know themselves and achieve their individual goals at every stage.

niña usando una computadora

Study plan and workload

This is why you will not find a pre-established study plan at West River Academy because we want to keep all beings from following another’s or the mass path. We only demand that you present to us at the end of the year report what the learning process was like, what you learned, and how it went from the family experience.

With us, you will find endless tools to assemble your study plan, whether planned or emerging as your son or daughter lives. Each family is different and knows what is best for each member. That is why we encourage natural education, whether respecting an entire period of 3 months in a single activity or diversifying several activities during the week. Observe with patience and trust. Remember it as a mantra: Patience and Trust.

Portada del libro de E. D. Hirsch

BONUS: Books in English by E. D. Hirsch.

If you are still not convinced by natural education and want to be covered by what your children should know in each grade according to the traditional educational system, the author E. D. Hirsch made a collection of books that are currently only in English. These are titled like: “ What Your Second Grader Needs to Know,” and there is a book for each grade, from preschool to high school. You must replace “second grader” with the degree you wish to investigate.

We hope this article has been helpful to you and you have been able to answer your doubts about which study plan or curriculum to choose when unschooling. We invite you to read other posts on our blog to delve deeper into the unschooling topic.

How is unschooling different from homeschooling?

Posted on by Monica Oliveros

How is unschooling different from homeschooling?

Posted on June 28, 2023

Many times you have read on our blog and throughout our website the word “Unschooling,” and it is possible that you approached us to do “Homeschooling.” You may have thought that they are synonymous. They are not, and each one has its particularity.

Homeschooling is usually the first approach to changing the traditional educational system to adapt to their lifestyle. This does not leave aside the subjects, grades, and evaluations. The content is dictated by the educational system, with a mixture of interests. All this is learned at the student’s pace and from home.

As we go through homeschooling, it is normal to lose a bit of the structure and the rhythm to become more and more lax. We start to worry if our children are being educated correctly. This period of family readjustment can be very uncomfortable for all family members, and the fear of the future and doubts about having made a good decision settle in family dynamics: Conflicts begin.

At this point, some families ask for outside help and hire tutors to help them maintain the pace with which they came, others return to the traditional educational system, and others opt for unschooling. All options are valid since only families know what is best for their children’s education.

Dos puertas de dos colores distintos

Homeschooling and Unschooling

Unschooling is about education without the curriculum established by the traditional educational system, without grades. At West River Academy (WRA), we feel comfortable with both systems and even dual enrollment if the family decides to continue with the traditional educational system and certify their other activities with us.

The fundamental pillar of unschooling is natural learning. This speaks of the promotion of the innate qualities of the individual, expanding the space for experimentation without rigorous study plans or excessive care. Giving rise to the spontaneity and curiosity inherent to the human being.

For many years we have been told that it is impossible to have a functional life if we do not have the same schedule every day; we share with a number of people and that someone else must bring us knowledge in a structured way. In reality, this type of education is one of the many that there are to offer. 

Choosing the traditional educational system is an option, but other alternatives can be accredited. At WRA, we pride ourselves on welcoming all those who do or do not fit into the established educational system. There are as many ways to be educated as there are families!

dos tipos de paredes, una de ladrillo y otra frisada

What is the difference and similarity?

The fundamental difference between homeschooling and unschooling is that in homeschooling, the school is transferred to the home, with all its elements. In contrast, unschooling is based on natural learning, and there are no subjects or evaluations but life. This is why our slogan is: “Turning life experiences into academic credit.”

In both systems, education is considered, one in a schooled way and the other in an unschooled way. It is common to confuse education with schooling when one contains the other, and they are not synonymous. Unschooling doesn’t mean being uneducated.

We hope we have clarified all the doubts regarding these two concepts with this brief explanation. Now that you know if you are homeschooling or unschooling or plan to try it, you know the difference.

Setting limits in parenting and in everything else is necessary.

Posted on by Monica Oliveros

Setting limits in parenting and in everything else is necessary.

Posted on June 27, 2023

When we think of setting limits in parenting, the first thing that comes to mind is the negative connotation that has fallen socially on the word “limit” and its derivatives: limitation, limited, and so on. This article will clean all the external emotions of the word and associate it from today with Freedom.

Limits never speak of being an obstacle or locking an individual into an idea. It talks about boundaries and that space that belongs to each individual or group of people and that not only helps us to respect others but also to respect and make our personal space respected.

Once this parameter is established, we can realize that limits are necessary, not only in parenting but also in the healthy development of any group of people of any age and any field.

Two fundamental factors for the limits to be effective are setting and enforcing them. It is only helpful to set limits with sustained accompaniment. Setting boundaries is not pleasant when the situation reaches a hostile point. It is always possible to do it.

niños jugando libremente en el bosque

Norms and limits in parenting

When we place limits on our children from an early age, these limits are usually given in a more conciliatory way. Another word associated with boundaries and with negative emotional charge is “authority.” We must also clean this word to make more helpful use, and we will do it in another article. We want to clarify that limits do not have much to do with authority. They have to do with Freedom and Respect.

To place healthy and practical limits, these have to be drawn from the natural consequences and not from the whims or fears of our wounded inner child. We have a guide to spot the difference. Once detected and healed, setting limits will be the most coherent and straightforward thing that has happened to you.

Practical exercise in understanding limits

In respectful parenting, the fundamental pillar is always to put yourself in the other’s shoes. It is based on empathy. That is, place ourselves at the same height as our children and do the exercise of feeling what they would experience, of being in the same place.

Today we bring an exercise that will change our perspective on how limits look, feel, and are needed and how they bring us a healthy coexistence.

mujer le habla a un hombre con mochila al aire libre

Let’s play with the imagination. First, we need you to get into character:

You decided to spend this year backpacking from one country to another. You don’t know what to expect from this first meeting with your host. You have never met them in person. 

 

Let’s play!

You arrive in the town with all your luggage, with the typical exhaustion of a train journey of hours and a walk to find your destination. When you finally find the address and knock on the door, your host opens with a big smile, but you can tell he’s in trouble. He quickly explains that an emergency arose, and he was waiting for you to come out. He hands you the keys to his house, tells you you’re at home, and leaves. He doesn’t give you the opportunity to accompany him.

Please take some time to reflect on how you feel and what your next step would be.

What could you do while your host is away? What would you do while you wait?

BREATHE — IMAGINE — FEEL

esperar

Possible answers

  1. You enter the house, visualize the clearest corner to leave your things, and disturb as little as possible, you hang around the house a bit, but you always end up next to your things and entertain yourself with your things to pass the time.
  2. You enter the house, leave your things at the entrance, and since you have the keys, you decide to go out and see the surroundings and come back when you think there will be someone at home.
  3. You enter the house, leave your things and go straight to the kitchen. You decide to please your host by receiving him when he returns with a typical meal from your country, plus you are hungry from the trip.

What is behind each answer

  1. You placed limits within ignorance and uncertainty, which made you fall prey to the situation. Much of your freedom is paralyzed until the host returns. Counterintuitively, someone else has control, even though they told you you are at home with the best smiles and intentions. This scenario benefits the one who does not set limits.
  2. You decided not to belong to the group, to continue until you could adequately interact with someone individually. In the best scenario, you arrive a few minutes before your host and start over. On the other hand, in a not-so-nice scenario, your host returns to look for something quick to return, he had given you the only key, and you are not there. The host seems aggrieved and shifts the blame to you.
  3. You are at your peak of freedom, happy with the surprise that your host will get, and when he arrives, you find out that some of the ingredients you used, he was going to use for something that he promised to bring the next day, and it is too late to replace it. Although your intentions were good, you added something else to your host’s day of emergencies. You feel responsible for the discomfort.
familia de tres integrantes, uno señala mostrando algo

Transferred to parenthood

The world of unschooling can be overwhelming at first, and one of the reasons is precisely not knowing how to set limits, confusing freedom with the absence of limits when in reality, it is the other way around.

Let’s switch roles. You are the host, and your son is the backpacker. Only now, you are the mother/father/tutor, and the child or adolescent is himself. In most cases, kids who have dropped out of the school usually start with option three, and if some punishments or rewards do not obey natural consequences, they turn to options 1 and 2.

The absence of limits could cause a lack of creativity due to fear of failure. Distance from the family so as not to disturb them. And three, in confusing behaviors, which are done with the best intentions, only the results are not harmonious with the family group. Does it sound familiar to you? Once this is known, everything is repairable. Limits are fundamental.

How to set boundaries in parenting

Following the same line as the backpacker, let’s play imagining again. You are again that person who travels and arrives at a stranger’s house, and your host receives you with a big smile, even though you notice he is in trouble. This time the situation has something different:

This person explains that they have an emergency, that everything is ready in your room, which is the one with a red and black duvet, and your bathroom is the yellow one on the right when you leave your room. He gives you a copy of the key and tells you that everyone has their own, that there is food already made in the kitchen, and that you can walk around the house except for the room in the back, which is blue and, above all things, you can’t touch the law books on the shelf. He says goodbye and leaves.

What could you do while your host is away? What would you do while you wait?

BREATHE —- IMAGINE — FEEL

esperar

You likely sit in your room, rest, bathe, eat, and feel completely free since you know the rules and how far you can go for the good of family life. We still can’t read minds, nor can your son or daughter.

Compared with situation 2, if your child understands the rules, he will be able to move freely and be authentic, without fear, as long as those limits are consistent and protect personal and group well-being.

Another important aspect when setting limits is that once established, the reason behind them is explained, but when reminded, they should be directed without needing further details. A long argument in a risky situation can lead to confusion and loss of the sense of limit.

As they demonstrate responsibility by taking specific actions, the boundaries will loosen as their purpose will be understood. Sometimes the limits will still exist, but we will no longer be responsible for enforcing them because it will not be necessary. Our children will understand and use them. 

This does not imply that in the future, we will once again have the responsibility to enforce it, remember that the second important factor of the limit is implementing them.

Don’t be afraid to set limits again

When we repeat behaviors that we were told are part of the role of a mother or father and do not question them, we likely believe that it is a weakness to set limits again since it is a lack of authority. How many times did you listen to others or hear yourself say? “How many times do I have to repeat it to you? ”; the answer is: as many times as necessary, and it will also be done in the same way as the first time, calmly, in a conciliatory and firm manner. Click here to read about an exercise that avoids repeating behaviors without question. 

An example of this can be seen in the field of cooking. When we start teaching our children to cook, a straightforward and typical rule is that they do not use sharp kitchen utensils. These are reserved for adults only. Over time, this rule is relaxed, allowing them to use them under adult supervision until they reach the point where they can handle the cookware without supervision.

However, at some point, they invite their friends over and, excited by the visit, begin to take the kitchen utensils as toys. In that case, it is necessary to take back the responsibility of setting limits and explain to them that their behavior was not responsible or safe for themselves or themselves. For this reason, “you will not be able to use the utensils again when there are visitors since you have shown that you cannot handle the situation with an additional variable.”

Over time, they may be able to use utensils with complete autonomy, but it is crucial ALWAYS to set limits. This is the way to accompany and care for our children.

madre colocando limites verbales a su hija en la cocina

Setting limits applies to children, adolescents, and adults, whether they are our children or not, as long as we are in a group with a common goal. This applies to a backpacker and host, at work, with friends, or in a sports team where you perform. In short, in every group of your life.

Setting limits and respecting the limits that others establish are essential to coexistence as long as they safeguard your safety and that of everyone. With this in mind, you can prepare your children to know how to act when faced with unfair rules that only benefit a particular group or person.

The key is to be consistent and live how we want the world to be.

I hope this walk through the limits has served you and knowing what to do lovingly and naturally.

Students who do not fit into the traditional education system

Posted on by Monica Oliveros

Students who do not fit into the traditional education system

Posted on June 27, 2023

Some students do not fit into the traditional system and have a characteristic feature that distinguishes them at school: they get bored and do not fit the mold. This mold is designed to carry out perfect harmony within the educational system. At West River Academy (WRA), we are pleased to receive these types of students because of their indomitable spirit.

In our day-to-day, as an educational institution, we receive emails, requests, and inquiries from parents who are concerned about their children. They worry they cannot fulfill themselves as human beings, as they are labeled within the traditional educational system.

These parents feel the pain of their children and their frustration at not being able to help them and ask with great sadness that we help them end this situation expeditiously; They ask us to advance years and certify degrees together so that their children can graduate from the educational system as soon as possible.

At WRA, we understand these family situations and discomforts very closely. This is why we are a solution for these demands; only it is impossible to do it the way said parents want. The good news is we have a much better counteroffer: Convert Life Experiences into Academic Credits.

Take a breath and stop to smell the roses

Knowing oneself, doing it at our own pace, and enjoying life are the fundamental pillars of our school. It is learning and educating yourself with your study plan and doing it in the order and rhythm you want: as each family feels and decides.

We do not recommend advancing years, certifying degrees together, and graduating early, because, being an institution established and legalized in the United States, this option can only be possible for early admission to the University or Technical School. Otherwise, it is not possible to advance degrees. And with our proposal, it is not necessary to promote years either.

We offer you to enter our institution with open content, we do not have a study plan, so your son or daughter will not have to get bored with pre-established content; instead, they can study what they want at the level they enjoy and not settle with the curricular design imposed by the traditional model.

Do your children love math and science? , at Khan Academy, the curriculum of studies up to Calculus II will be at your disposal. It’s even a great idea to encourage them to start with what they want to learn and realize that they could review and study previous content to reach their goal: at their own pace, in the order he wants, and as many times as he likes!

Do your kids love the arts and language? , in Kubrio, they will find endless artistic expressions, clubs, intensive courses, and study groups with this dye. In Kubrio, there is also space for the sciences, only that its members have taken it more towards the artistic, learning science through debates and creative expressions as projects. With people from all over the world!

Do your children love sports? In your town, there are thousands of options at different levels. The body is a machine that is forged, and sports need muscle memory, and this takes time. We have many students who train 12 to 18 hours a week. They are holistically focused on reaching their goals!

Do they love to delve into everything? They have 24 hours a day to choose what they want to learn. With video games, books, movies, and live. Why rush this extraordinary time?

At WRA, we focus more on helping you do what you love rather than on completing a list of knowledge to go from one grade to the next and then forget it. Each person has a gift that is accompanied by one or more interests. And that’s what we’re aiming for.

Mano levantando un birrete de graduación

How to certify without the official curricular design?

One of our benefits as an educational institution is being able to certify a school grade each year, respecting the official subjects, and adding, in the case of high school, some elective subjects. 

Parents can request a transcript of grades each year and thus certify each year from preschool. If the educational goal at home is to graduate from high school, they can wait for the last four years of high school and certify only those four years. 

The four years the student must accredit to graduate from high school must be equivalent in your country to the 9th, 10th, 11th, and 12th grades in the United States. And these four years must be completed in 4 different years.

Said transcription of notes will be the equivalent of what the student experienced. By making an annual summary or report of what you have learned, you will realize that you have covered every aspect of it: math, language, science, biology, etc., only with your curriculum, time, and depth.

 

Our proposal to students who do not fit into the educational system.

We live one year at a time. We don’t have a remote control that advances us years at will. We live them all and learn accordingly. At West River Academy, we encourage families to live their education through natural learning. It is unnecessary to advance years when you find a proposal so human and adapted to your day-to-day. There is no need to rush to live.

In addition, you can hear a very thoughtful podcast about this topic from Peggy Webb, Founder and Director of West River Academy:

 

We hope this article has brought the peace of mind and certainty you sought when contacting us. If you still have questions, schedule a free 15-minute consultation or read more on our blog.

Enroll with us if you don’t need anything else to start your educational freedom.

A simple way to do unschooling: deschooling the adult brain

Posted on by Monica Oliveros

A simple way to do unschooling: deschooling the adult brain

Posted on June 27, 2023

When we start the path of unschooling, it is almost always through our children; for a long time, we think this is for them. The reality is that our children are just the excuse to be able to unschooled ourselves.

Unschooling the adult brain is an idea that comes to mind abstractly. It is an intuition and a feeling that we do not say out loud since we do not know how “correct” that phrase is. This feeling is the first indication that you started your journey to freedom.

Unschooling as a Philosophy of Life

It is typical to feel embarrassed by the idea of ​​taking the reins of family education since part of our schooling starts from being ashamed of being free and feeling special and unique. Just thinking about it would be ridiculous and even selfish if we were to feel it. If you thought this way or are feeling this way, I hug you, and today we will take one more step toward that feeling.

Our children have spent less time in school, and in some cases, they have not been in school, so they are not the ones who have to adapt to their new life. They have to adjust to you, the schooled adult, to adjust to their new life.

This article is written so that you can embrace your adaptation as an adult towards unschooling, give yourself permission to go through your process as long as you need it, and not bring your children into your process.

Once we understand that unschooling is not an educational method, but a family lifestyle, you will see how everything flows at home and have the calm and freedom you were looking for when the idea first entered your brain. It takes time and is uphill after a year or so of trying. It is normal. Furthermore, it is part of the process.

Desescolarizando el cerebro adulto 2

Unschooling the adult brain

The first thing to know is how the brain learns. It does through external incentives, whatever they may be, and it also has such plasticity that it can adapt to any new motivation, which allows us to learn and unlearn with or without awareness of it.

The neurons receive the information, make it travel through the synapse, and if this same stimulus is repeated several times, then memories are forged.

Memories are not always forged by repetition. The brain needs to be excited to learn, and a strong emotional experience, whether pleasant or not, can fix specific learning in our brain just by feeling it once. Both schooling and unschooling provide and are enriched by this same process.

Unschooling stages

It does not matter if we start unschooling in our children’s adolescence or when they are two years old; our unschooling process is usually activated in the same order.

Throughout our school life, they have imbued us with different levels of fears and requirements to meet according to the stage we live in the school. We will transmit these fears to our children without the need to place them out loud but transform them into exacerbated security and protection.

For this first stage, which is ours… as adults, we will continuously scan our fears. Why continuously? Because the vast majority of our worries linked to school are unconscious and only surface when an action activates them; then there will be many, many fears that you will not be able to work on by only sitting in the living room of your house and with a coffee contemplating the horizon; it is more likely you will do it at the moment in which you interact with other people, mainly with your children.

West River Academy

The two levels of guilt and the limits

To start unlearning, learning, and relearning to forge our new lifestyle, we must be aware of our beliefs and how they govern us. To eliminate the guilt that unconsciously seeds fear in us.

To do this continuously, we have to realize that we took our children out of the educational system because several things did not resonate with us, and one of them is how far the system is from the personal reality of its students. 

A reality not seen in the educational system is that adults have feelings, emotions and that we are not perfect. In fact, for the traditional educational method, showing our feelings and doubts in front of our children symbolizes weakness. The way to do this exercise is by showing our children that we are exploring this path with as many uncertainties as they are and that sometimes we can feel overwhelmed and do not understand why. 

In this exercise, we are going to investigate two levels of guilt through these three questions: 

  • Do I do it because they are my fears?
  • Do I do it because I am repeating patterns?
  • Do I do it because I set limits?

It is continuous, and although simple, it can be challenging to apply. With practice, it will come automatically.

Exercise to Unschool the Schooled Adult Brain

There are plenty of opportunities to put the exercise into practice. Whenever we feel the need to scold, punish, force, or guide our children without taking a moment of introspection about whether they need to be taught, it is the right time to start the exercise. 

We have been told that we must act immediately; otherwise, the purpose of the correction is not understood. This is half true; if no explanation precedes the action, the child will not see the connection. Today, you will learn how to create that connection. This is all you need to do this exercise organically.

A characteristic example of the perfect moment to start the exercise is the following:

You go to the park, your kid goes up on the opposite side the game was designed for, and he is doing it in a hazardous way.

The first natural reaction of a schooled brain is to yell for him to get off and call him to tell him never to do that again, that it is very dangerous. A list of possible scenarios invites him to reflect so he never does it again. Does it sound familiar to you?

I invite you to do it differently, do not feel bad if you only think about it the first time (or first times) and do what I stated before. It is a process. Be nice to you. What I invite you to do is the following:

You call your child’s attention, maybe by shouting, maybe not. Trust the process, as it comes out instinctively. When he gets to you, explain to him that this makes you very nervous, that you haven’t been able to figure out how it makes you feel, and that if he can do his best not to play like that for today. Later, when you know how it made you feel, you explain it to him. 

It is feasible that he will do it again after 15-20 minutes. You simply remind him of what you talked about. Children are very open and compassionate; it’s just that they still place their desires above other things, and their memory fails them in those cases. They don’t do it on purpose; that’s how human beings develop, don’t take it personally.

Desescolarizando el cerebro adulto 4 / deschooling the adult brain

In a reflective moment, that you don’t have to be in their care, either when bathing or before going to bed or waking up, ask yourself why you don’t want your child to use the game like this:

Do I react like this because it is my fear?

Try to visualize how your son maneuvers his body at home and how aware he is of his motor skills.

If at home he never does anything physical and you don’t know how he handles his body, or you have seen him being an enthusiast, but he always ends up falling, then your fear is for his safety and not for transference. You can go to the next question.

Now, if when you visualize your son, you realize that he is the miniature version of spider-man and that he is fully aware of his body and the rest of the objects; then the fear is yours, and you are adding to his backpack beliefs (who already has his fears and will have other worries as he lives) that are not his and that has nothing to do with his capabilities. In this case, you don’t need to continue investigating and talk to your son; tell him what you felt, and the conversation will be different, it will be about safety, about preparing before climbing a new object, and not about an a priori prohibition of an innate ability.

Do I react like this because I repeat patterns?

If you proceed to the second question, try to visualize yourself, your role as a mother/father, and what is expected of your position. Is this your way to protect your child unconditionally and no matter what? We can answer it quickly with these two options: 1) That unconditionally includes his personal decisions. 2) Or, on the contrary, you know you are there to accompany him.

Travel back to your childhood and remember a similar situation, whether as a child, adolescent, or adult, where you wanted to try something new and were forbidden because your parents did not see your ability to solve this new challenge together. 

If you found that episode and it struck a chord within you, first allow yourself that moment to internalize the discovery because deschooling the adult brain moves many internal processes that were very comfortable resting in our psyche. Another way to know if you are about to encounter the episode and you are not yet ready to face it is that you will respond in your mind with “because it was always done that way,” “because it should be,” or “because there is no other way to do it.”

If so, you do not need to skip to the next question. Once you are calm with your process, call your son to talk about why he decided to get on like this, if he saw it from someone else, if he wants to try lower and go up, if he felt good doing it, or if when he attempted to it, he realized that it was not his thing or if he wants to try again with supervision to see how it goes. Let your child decide to do or not do an activity anymore.

If you didn’t find that episode, or if you found it and it gave you a lot of strength, and you feel good about that episode, go to the next question. 

Do I react like this because I set limits?

If your child has never shown the ability to climb anything and there is no “should be” or “because it was always done that way” in your reaction, it is because you know when to set limits. Now we will work on how to set them. 

Call your son and tell him that even if he wants to try new things, he always has to be prepared when he increases the difficulty of things. That he has your 100% support and that you want to be present and warned every time he tries something new, so you can assist him and be present as his security and support team. If it is his passion, he will do it with more and more skill; perhaps at home, he has yet to have the opportunity to try this type of activity. And if he is uninterested, he will leave him and have better self-awareness.

Desescolarizando el cerebro adulto / deschooling the adult brain

Final Recommendations

Added to this is not pushing our children when we know they have an innate ability. We only sometimes want to eat our favorite dish every day. There are times of exploration that are as rich and vital as having discipline. 

You always have to ask about the cause of their decisions and not force them at once or the opposite, to let them resign just by asking. Always call to feel and raise awareness of what drives us.

If it is your passion, he will return to it. If not, it is a tool to face the next activity. It is never wasted time when freedom is respected.

Once you begin to face this exercise with each situation (or almost with each case), there will come a time when you will not stop to ask yourself the questions, and you will directly know what it is about, and you will be able to act at the moment. It takes time: it’s very satisfying and healing once you get it.

Other stages of unschooling have to do with the adult brain. We will publish them. Check out the newsletters if you are part of WRA, or visit us regularly to discover new content if you are not enrolled yet. Remember to clear doubts before signing up with a free 15-minute call.

Josie’s Graduation Project

Posted on by Peggy Webb

Josie’s Graduation Project

Posted on February 22, 2022

We encourage students to choose a Graduation Project format that showcases their talents, as well as meets our requirement of illustrating their entire educational journey; from their early years up to the present day.

View the Digital Illustration of her educational journey at the bottom of this page, as you read the written narration to explain her creative process.

I became a student at West River Academy when I was 10 years old. I’m now 18 and will be moving to New York City in the fall to study art and design at Pratt Institute. This Graduation Project explores my time at West River Academy and is loosely based on the Greek myth of Persephone as I chronicle my journey from childhood to womanhood.

It starts at the house we lived in when I was in elementary school. My favorite thing about that house was the giant palm tree in the front yard that looked like a huge pineapple. It made our incredibly suburban house just a little more fun. You’ll also see my cat, Lucy, who loved to be outside and who I miss very much. In the back is my family who I had to include in this; they’ve supported me every step of the way on my journey to adulthood. In 4th grade, I was a voracious reader so I filled the cloud space with my favorite books from that period of time.

I named the Queen Mary 2 (QM2) “Hades” to represent the chariot in which Hades took Persephone to the Underworld. There are so many different tellings of the Persephone myth, but my favorite version is the one where, instead of being kidnapped, Persephone chooses to go to the Underworld with Hades, seeking adventure.

When we started unschooling, so many of my friends said that I’d never be able to get a job or go to college, if I didn’t stay in school. We knew from the very first day that it was a good decision for our family, but still, we were bored in the suburbs. With our new freedom, we put everything we owned in storage and embarked on what ended up being an almost two-year world schooling adventure, really going into the unknown. The second section depicts the QM2 which was the start of our adventure. You’ll see my dog, Toffee, and the friend she made in the portholes. On deck you’ll see my friend playing the blow-up saxophone, which I still have and treasure. We each had a backpack and just a few personal items, but we each needed one formal outfit for the QM2. It was my first “gown.”

This is the dress I wear as I step off the boat into my middle school years, lantern raised as my curiosity, to explore Europe’s treasures. Here, I just mark the highlights in Rome, Paris, and London. Most of my memories are captured on film. I got my first good camera on this trip and curated a highlight book of my photography, several images of which helped form my portfolio for Pratt. As you might imagine, photography became a life-long love through those years of regularly exploring something totally new.

Eventually, my brother and I missed playing sports and wanted to settle back in SoCal. This third panel of my scroll represents my high school years. During this time, I learned what I enjoyed doing and what I didn’t enjoy doing, represented by volleyball and working at our local ice cream place. Volleyball represents my discipline and drive, working with others, making friends, achieving goals and having a lot of fun doing it. That would be the Elysian Fields in my Persephone analogy, whereas the ice cream job was more like Tartarus. I thought it would be fun and full of smiles, but no one there really liked their job, the management was demeaning, and the customers were entitled.

Books were the biggest part of my elementary, middle school, and traveling years, and then high school was all about music. During high school, I was introduced to new genres of music that I’ve come to love and portrayed it here with the names of my favorite artists in the dark clouds between this section and the next.

The final section of my scroll represents springtime, my future, and the adult Persephone returning to the world anew. The gusts of wind are full of my interests and what I plan to pursue, but I imagine there will be some surprises along the way. Unschooling has kept me ready to notice and respond to what’s new, to carve my path, and to make my way.

 

Screen Shot 2022 03 21 at 7.37.08 PM 1 2048x511 1

Damian’s Story

Posted on by Peggy Webb

Damian’s Story

Posted on January 31, 2022

As students come to the end of their high school journey, we ask them to reflect on their entire life and present it to us in the form of a Graduation Project. The student may choose how they would like to present it; as a written biography or a custom idea, such as a presentation, art piece with written narration, or video compilation.

In this Graduation Project, Damian shares how he fell in love with the student-led learning approach to education and shares the various ways that he incorporated his studies into his daily routine.  

As Nelson Mandela once said, I also believe that education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world. It not only gives you confidence and satisfaction, but also allows your dreams to become a reality. You can contribute to a better world!  

In my case, education has been a factor of extreme importance. I was raised very differently from other kids and was given the possibility to do another kind of school, which I’m very grateful for. West River Academy has offered me a unique chance to find out who I am, what I’m really good at, and act upon my talents. I transferred from my previous public school in fifth grade. Being enrolled at West River Academy has taught me how to learn from a different perspective and my process of learning won’t end, as one’s educational journey throughout his life never ends. I have really loved learning under the trees, being able to breathe fresh air and synchronize with nature. The freedom this school provides has allowed me to do everything with pleasure; from school tasks to planting flowers in the garden. I’ve dedicated all my spare time to reading books and studying about animals, plants or history. I’m not going to mention all the titles of the books I’ve read because I won’t be able to fit them all on these pages. A separate biography should be made, only to describe their uniqueness and incredible artistic style in which the author wrote them. Each one of them means a lot to me. They taught me how to improve myself and become a better person; for me, and for society. Everything has a meaning to me. The unpleasant things or the uncomfortable situations that occasionally happen to us, always have a meaning. There’s always something to learn from them and this is important for me. Improving myself by understanding the moral of the story. Learning from my mistakes or others’, is the key point of realizing my dream, to become a wise person and spread love-the most important of them all, among the people.

I don’t know how I would think and act if I had studied in a public school all this time, but I most certainly know that by being homeschooled, I am able to analyze everything from all the viewing angles and enjoy life’s biggest gifts for us all, such as the surrounding nature. Above all of this, I’ve had much more freedom. While others fight for their lives, we complain about how hard life is. It is important to be grateful for what you have, no matter how few things you possess. I remember a book, called Pollyanna, where the protagonist (Pollyanna herself) always plays “the glad game” to avoid feeling sad and unhappy. She would find joy even in the most ordinary things and turn the sad moments into something with a good meaning.  

On to other topics, I didn’t like Math but it has a big importance, so learning it is unavoidable. It also develops your sense. Learning can be fun if you do it properly. I would even learn during family trips. That’s because I was eager to accumulate new information. You can always find one or more books in my backpack. So, I mix pleasure with utility.  I don’t understand how watching documentaries is boring for some people. There are so many details, both mentally and visually pleasing.

Education has brought me self-acceptance and forgiveness because you need to have the power and courage to forgive yourself for the mistakes you’ve made while also forgiving others. Courage, because doing this is not easy. It does not happen overnight. On the contrary, it takes time. Sometimes too much. Now, you’re probably saying that we cannot afford the luxury of wasting time but when dealing with such matters, pushing yourself too hard or rushing this process can be damaging for your health. So, what I would recommend to everyone is to take as much time as needed and be patient. I did well in all the school subjects. However, Physics and Math were not “my thing”. I found more joy in humanistic sciences but I’ve put more effort into what I’m not so good at and gave myself time. This process of improving my “weak points” has taken a while but was definitely worth the wait.  

I have many hobbies including photography, reading, writing and travel. There is so much that can be shown and expressed through photography. This world has so much beauty, just waiting to be explored and captured by your camera. You can visit historical places, find out new things about people’s customs and traditions. Taste their food. Contemplate their art. Listen to their music and understand their sorrows.

There are some people who can’t afford to travel but you can make their day by showing them your photos or posting them on your Instagram, for example. So, photography not only makes me happy but also brings joy to others, fulfilling my purpose, which is to spread joy and love.

Technology is also one of my secondary hobbies. I love to find out about new technologies and devices. From the latest cameras to smartphones or smart home devices. It’s a completely different world but with flaws, like ours. Many things could be changed with its help if we knew how to properly use it. I consider it a waste of energy, material, to have such powerful devices and machines and do nothing meaningful with them. Such a shame…

Music is one of the best things in the world. It calms and helps me when I feel tension or have anxiety moments. I’m part of a generation who’s trying to feel something. Inspire others. Offer help or even do a change. Most of us are always sad because the world we live in got much worse than it was in the past. There is so much pressure in the air… But here come a few questions. How will the next generation live and enjoy life, if we don’t make it easier but harder for them? How will our children be able to learn and behave as we want them to if we don’t reach their hearts and make them feel and believe what we teach them? Nothing good happens if we stay on hold, procrastinate. It only gets worse and worse. Evil grows stronger and stronger while we’re waiting for things to randomly become good. It evolves faster than we can imagine. That’s the reason why we should be prepared and overcome it with good, because, in the end, that’s all we can do.

Many people may find me weird because I’m more concerned about the feelings and the soul. Nowadays parents tend to ignore this aspect of education or tell their kids it’s bad for them to feel vulnerable. It is shameful to cry. I have encountered many cases. I cannot feel anything but pity for those kids and shame for their parents. This kind of education breaks a child. It makes him unable to feel compassion and love. I think this is the most important part of education. To teach your child how and when to be vulnerable, who to trust, and to be an honest and forgiving person.

I also enjoy writing poems. I started doing this in 2017. I was 15 at that time. I get inspiration from people’s experiences and struggles, as well as my own. The goal is to reach people’s hearts and make myself heard; to help heal life’s wounds and show people they’re not alone in this world. Everyone is unique and important to the world. Our life is a treasure we tend to neglect.

I learned that, in order to live a happy and healthy life, we should stop being so self-centered and also focus on others’ problems and cries for help. I help people as much as I can, whether it’s hard or not. Love can heal wounds and repair the damages. It is much easier to be bad but by doing that, you do harm to yourself and then to others. You have nothing to win but pride, which will never help you. Nothing compares with the intense and good feeling of helping someone in need or the satisfaction of offering somebody a gift from your heart. Seeing the happiness in their eyes and the smile on their face just makes you want to fly. Warm hugs are always free. I like to give people as many hugs as possible. So, whether it is a friend or somebody I’ve just met, I give him some hugs; make him feel safe and relaxed. My friends or people who’ve met me say I’m a warm and kind guy.  I don’t know. If they say that, maybe I am. What I think is also very important in life is modesty.

You can’t fully be a great person without modesty. It’s not about just making an impression among people and being praised. You need to be genuinely authentic, honest and sincere. Otherwise, you’d be a fraud. A lost cause. But it’s never too late. There is always a way to do things right. Education should not be only about school subjects. It should also be about building a good and strong character. About how to properly take care of our planet and protect it from pollution. It’s so sad to see that animals and nature are also suffering and begging us for help. But we do nothing. We decide that our ego is more important, therefore we ignore it or silence and discourage those trying to make a positive change.

Fortunately, I was a lucky child. My parents gave me the proper education every other child should receive. Of course, no one is perfect. So, I cannot say I received the perfect education. But it’s the uniqueness and effort of doing it well, that made the difference. I cannot thank them and West River Academy enough, for this rare chance of living a happy and healthy life. But I can try to share with others the good that I’ve received. I can show them a way, in which they can fulfill their dreams easier and live in peace with themselves and others.

Last year has been a hard one for everyone. It will continue to be difficult in the following years. Despite all of this, I think we now have more time to reflect upon our lives and see how and what we can improve. We should encourage each other and stay united. There is a Romanian proverb saying that, when there are more than two people together, the power grows stronger. I totally agree with it. If we’re united then we’re like a firewall, nothing can pass beyond it.

What we can also do is take care of nature. Because of pollution, the air we breathe is highly contaminated and poisonous for our organisms. Planting more trees and keeping the green areas, is a crucial step in preventing this from happening. It really makes me so sad to see how our forests are cut down, to build more shopping centers or to extend the cities. Here, in Romania, we are frequently running projects and petitions against deforestation. Most of the wood is not even used inside the country. It’s sent to Austria. Unfortunately, we are only a few. So, nothing really changes. People are too busy fighting and hating each other to do something meaningful for the nation. Ignorance holds the crown. Having the latest cars and devices is all that matters. The suicide rate is higher than ever. Many children, young adults, or even seniors commit suicide. People everywhere are judging instead of helping and understanding the reason that causes the pain. Animal cruelty is also everywhere. I am fighting for a change. But we’re not enough and often we’re called names and told that we are crazy.  At least I have tried. I did my part and I won’t feel guilty.

Now I want to talk about sports a little. This is an important aspect of life and shouldn’t be avoided. For a healthy life, food and sports play an important role. There is a strong relationship between these two. Doctors and fitness coaches recommend eating more vegetables and fruits, for a healthy organism. I go to the gym or do physical exercises at home, now that the situation is different due to pandemic restrictions. During the summer, I gather with my friends and play tennis and badminton. I used to go to a gun-shooting center where I learned to use handguns.

In the end, I want to say that no aspects were neglected during my education and my parents provided me with everything I needed to “complete” it. I am very happy that I could learn at home and was taught to love learning because, without education, my life would be totally different. When you do what you love, there aren’t any obstacles that you can’t overcome. I’m happy to share with you my educational journey and all the meaningful things in my life. I hope that my educational biography will touch your heart and put a smile on your face. I wrote it in a unique way and tried to provide as many details as possible. I leave here a piece of my heart. Reflecting upon my life and everything I did, has made me realize once again, how much I love what I do. Passion is the key to success. Thank you for helping me become who I am today. You are very dear to me and I am sending you big hugs. 

I want to become a professional writer and inspire others through my work. I want to show people how beautiful life is if you know how to live it. I want to make people love life and enjoy every nice moment they spend with each other. Teach their kids to be loving and forgiving and take care of our nature. We are the ones that can still fight for a better future. When I do something, I always think about the next generation. How to do it better, to have a good impact upon them because the future will hold in their hands. If they won’t learn from our mistakes, then the world will crash. I see many young people who are lost and searching for someone to inspire them. Maybe they did not have the chance I had. They are in pain. You can easily see that. They need to be encouraged and told that the chance for a better living is in their hands. They are important and the world needs them. Every moment of pain and fear was a test for them to pass. A lesson to learn from and use for good purposes. Life has so much to offer. You only need love, passion and will, to pursue your dreams. 

Sometimes, it takes a lot of hard work and sweat, but in the end, there’s nothing to be lost, only achieved. This world is some kind of heaven. We are the ones that can destroy it or heal it. It’s a matter of choice whether we do the first or the second one. I choose to be on the good side and fight for freedom and happiness over sadness and pain. I am a free young man who enjoys life at its best and tries to help others do the same. 

I will end my educational biography with this quote: “The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” -Nelson Mandela

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